Movie #5

5: Snatch

Turkish and his rather strange accomplice Tommy get pulled into the world of match fixing by the notorious Brick Top. Things get complicated when the boxer they had lined up gets the shit kicked out of him by Pitt, a 'pikey' as they call him. They then try to convince Pitt not only to fight for them, but to lose for them too. Whilst all this is going on, a huge diamond heist takes place, and a fistful of motley characters enter the story, including 'Cousin Avi', 'Boris The Blade', 'Franky Four Fingers' and 'Bullet Tooth Tony'. Things go from bad to worse as it all becomes about the money, the guns, and the damned dog!

How can you successfully tie together a story involving an unlicensed boxing promoter, a gypsy fighter, an unhinged pig-feeding gangster, a diamond thief and his boss from New York, two pawn shop workers, a henchman, and a dog? I don't know, but Guy Ritchie sure did a great job of it. The editing was amazing and used some pretty original cinematography. If you have the DVD, I recommend turning on the Brad Pitt subtitles at least once...it's nearly impossible to understand him. I think you need to have an appreciation for dry British humour in this one. Observe:

Avi: Should I call you Bullet? Tooth?
Bullet Tooth Tony: You can call me Susan if it makes you happy.
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Turkish: Fuck me, hold tight. What's that?
Tommy: It's me belt, Turkish.
Turkish: No, Tommy. There's a gun in your trousers. What's a gun doing in your trousers?
Tommy: It's for protection.
Turkish: Protection from what? "Zee Germans"?
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Turkish: We've lost Gorgeous George.
Brick Top: Shhh. You're going to have to repeat that.
Turkish: We've lost Gorgeous George.
Brick Top: Well, where'd you lose him? He ain't a set of fucking car keys, is he? And it ain't as if he's incon-fucking-spicuous now, is it?
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Sol: I'm not in here to make a fucking bet.
Female Bookie: 'Preciate it, but all... bets... are... off. If all bets are off, then there can't be any money can't there?
Sol: I'm not fucking buying that.
Female Bookie: Well that's handy, 'cause I ain't fucking selling it.

Snatch was nominated for no Oscars. That's right...sweet FA. Not even the Golden Globes showed Snatch any respect.